Next to Hemingway

Free Queer Fish in God's Waiting Room ebook

2011-05-15T19:16:00.002+01:00

An interview on Meet the Author

2008-06-06T20:00:00.004+01:00

I recently did an interview about the book with the Meet The Author website.

Short film by Amir Jamal

2008-03-12T15:33:00.002Z

The producer and director Amir Jamal has made a short film about Queer Fish in God's Waiting Room.

Here's some more information about Amir...

AMIR JAMAL - Producer/Director

Award-Winning director/producer specialising in observational ‘human interest’ documentaries and polemics. Always had passion for Drama, and Directed first short film last year to great critical acclaim in national press. Now also developing innovative. multi-media websites.

2008 – Gazelle Media
Producer/Director setting up innovative new Web TV platform, critically acclaimed in new media press, Broadcast, and The Independent newspaper.

2006/7 – More4 - Weddings and Beheadings (10’)¬
First drama short film co-written with Hanif Kureishi, shown at Curzon Mayfair, ICA, Riverside Studios.
DAILY TELEGRAPH, 17th January 2007 – “Terrific and strikingly poignant”

2006 – Al-Arabiya -Them and Us (60’)
60’ Observational Documentary on Finsbury Park Mosque. Most viewed documentary on largest middle-eastern platform.

2005 – ITV1 - The Tube – (4 x 30’) self-shot Ob Docs, including ‘specials’ filmed on 7/7 bombings. Won Silver Medal at Prix Europa.

BROADCAST, 4 November 2005
“The terror attacks that rocked London on 7 July were a media event on a massive scale, but Jamal’s unique access that morning got footage no news channel could. What began the day as a quirky observational documentary on the lives of London Underground employees quickly became a unique insight into a city in the grip of terror”

2004/5 – BBC 2 Special Theme Night Pakistani Actually
Producer/Director on two films for the night. RTS Nomination.
British, Paki & Proud – (35’) – This film led the night and achieved critic’s choices in every national newspaper.
THE GUARDIAN, 5 March 2005
“The night starts with this enthralling documentary…”
TIME OUT, March 2005
“This engrossing documentary…”

Who Wants To Be A Mullah? – (20’) – Quirky film tackling difficult subject, self-shot on DV and also critically acclaimed in the press with many ‘Pick of the Days’.

2003/4 – BBC1/ABC (USA) – Hope In Motion – Christopher Reeve
Multi Award winning documentary about the actor’s final physical, political, and personal struggle. Producer responsible for structuring key video diary style DV interview as his story unfolded. Body of film structured around this.

2002/3 – National Geographic 8 x 50’ Adventure Films
Producer/Self-Op cutting on Avid Xpress DV.

2001 – Primetime BBC2 – Prince Naseem’s Guide To Islam (30’) – Producer/Director
Pacy programme using complex filming techniques (eg. timeslice)
Royal Television Society Commendation

2001 – Primetime BBC2 – My Name Is Ahmed (30’) – Producer/Director
Observational documentary shot by myself on DV for BBC2 Islam UK Season.
Chosen by controller of BBC2 for presentation at the official launch of the season.
Nominated for Prix Europa

2000 – Transworld International – DV Director Magazine show reviewing short film festivals around the world. Programme review of Sundance Film Festival praised by Sundance committee.

2000 – BBC2 Documentary - The Silence of the Farms (40’) – Producer/DV Director
A year in the life of a struggling Welsh hill farmer and his family.
Critics Choice in every national newspaper.

THE TIMES
“Compulsory viewing for all politicians”

1999 – BBC1 Inside Story – Heart Team (50’) – DV Director
Chosen by BBC to shoot high quality DV of heart transplants to be intercut with top digibeta crew material.

1998 – BBC2 Video Diaries – Last Chance on Thin Ice (40’) – Producer
Adventurer David Hempleman-Adams’ record breaking trek to the North Pole.
Worldwide sales through MIP/Cannes
DAILY TELEGRAPH
“A stunning documentary set in a mesmerizing landscape”

1998 – BBC2 – Nightmare In Paradise by Sean Langan (3 x 40’) - Producer
Journalist Sean Langan on the trail of hostages and muhajedeen in Kashmir.
Critics choices in all national press.

1997 – BBC2 – Before I Die (3 x 10’) – DV Director
Short films with people suffering from terminal illness.
Highly acclaimed. Presented by BBC at Brazilian Documentary Festival.

TIME OUT
“Powerful and heartbreaking”

Akira the Don's review

2008-02-19T12:08:00.001Z

I'm delighted to report that Akira the Don likes the book

A review on Writewords

2008-02-19T08:54:00.001Z

There's a very generous review of the book on Writewords

Your first line is free

2008-02-19T07:53:00.002Z

My Publisher, Legend Press, is giving away the first third of the book for free at their website.

'Distincitve and Engaging' The Guardian

2008-02-17T22:48:00.006Z

The Guardian reviewed my book yesterday.

In the morning, I read an interview by Iain Banks in The Word. He said that authors should never read reviews of their work or check their ranking on Amazon. That sounded like excellent advice to me because I wasn't expecting to get any reviews for my book and I was still recovering from being ranked 300,000-and-something the week after it was released.

Then I got a text from my agent, Judith, telling me there was an excellent review in The Guardian. I legged-it to the newsagents, of course. And, I've just visited Amazon to see that they've run out of copies of the book and my ranking has jumped to 30,000-and-something.

I can't help but be encouraged.

A trailer for the book

2008-02-11T11:38:00.000Z

It's not Hollywood, but I like it.

Reading at the launch party

2008-02-04T20:00:00.001Z

Questions from Writewords

2008-02-03T09:47:00.000Z

I have answered these questions for the Writewords website

Tell us all about your writing background-
Freud sat behind his couch because he didn’t want his patients staring at him. I feel the same way about my writing. I’m not keen on reading it or talking about it. I will always talk about it if I’m asked though because I want to find an audience for it, although you will notice that my answers to these questions become increasingly uptight.

Most of my writing gets chucked in a box and stays there. Queer Fish in God’s Waiting is the first sensible thing to come out of that box.

I’ve only finished two stories before, my University dissertation – a short story called Hedley Had An Erection – and another short story for the Manor House Book Club, A Pocket full of Cheese and a Garden full of Trees.

Other work besides writing; ie. Editing, dramaturgy, tutoring, and how it works for/against your own writing
There’s truth in literature, art and poetry, say, just like there’s truth in a conversation at the pub, a fight at a wedding or gossip over the garden fence. My other work is advertising and PR, which, like the journalism I did before it, can only pervert the truth. That’s not to say it works against my writing. If I didn’t have my day job to compare it to, it probably wouldn’t be as enjoyable. As Aldous Huxley said, it’s in relation to their opposites that things have significance to us.

How, when and why did you first start writing?
I went to an ordinary primary school in Macclesfield with one teacher you could’ve described as creative, Mr Whale. He’d chalk the word WHACK in reverse on a sawn-off cricket bat, for example, just before he smacked your arse with it to spell the word on your pants. I remember one parents’ evening where he told my mum and dad that my marks for writing were off-the-chart because I did so much of it.

So I started young, and I do it because I like it.

Who are your favourite writers/influences and why?
I can’t say that I have favourites. There are plenty that I like, but when I decide to read a book it rarely has anything to do with the author. Today I chose Brick Lane over Willard and his Bowling Trophies and A Sort of Life, for example, going for an author I know nothing about over two who I enjoy because I felt like reading something contemporary.

Regarding my influences, I’m like a cushion, I carry the impression of the last person to sit on me.

Here’s a list of five books I’ve ready recently that inspired me.

Big Sur and The Oranges of Hieronymus Bosch by Henry Miller
The Master and Margarita by Mikhail Bulgakov
One People by Guy Kennaway
Blindness by Jose Saramago
The Thought Gang by Tibor Fischer

How did you get your first agent/ commission/publication?
I was recently complicit in a lie about this, putting the publisher’s decision to publish Queer Fish in God’s Waiting Room down to the Next to Hemingway stunt (people took photos of the book inside bookstores for my blog). The truth is less interesting. I played 5-a-side football with the publisher, told him about the book, he read it and offered to publish it.

What’s the worst thing about writing?
I’m too enthusiastic about writing to consider the worst thing about it. I’ve heard talk of the tyranny of the blank page, the famous writers’ block, but Van Gogh said why should a painter be afraid of a blank canvas, a blank canvas should be afraid of the painter. I thrash every page I write on until it submits.

And the best?
There’s a very small space between the page and the end of your pen – that’s where you’ll find the best thing about writing.

Tell us what kind of response you get from audiences/readers and if/how this affects/influences your writing
I once read at The Poetry Cafe in Covent Garden and the audience, who, to be fair to them, weren’t expecting a prose reader, looked at me, to quote Bill Hicks, like a dog that has just been shown a card trick. There are lots of terrible words and offensive ideas in my book and I chose to read them.

I don’t write to please, how could you, but I always hope to entertain, and it disappoints me when I don’t.

What was your breakthrough moment?
About ten years ago I went to Hawaii for several weeks and it was there that I found the confidence to speed write, to just chuck-out all the thoughts in my head without panicking or breaking for up to 3 hours even if it what I was writing was private or gibberish.

What inspires you to write?
Emptying my head of conflicting thoughts.

Do you have a writing routine? A place that’s special?
No.

Do you address particular themes or issues in your writing?
I’d rather not discuss that. That’s for the reader to decide.

Where do you get your ideas from?
From my friends, from other books, and from things I see on the streets.

Any tips for new writers?- things you’ve learned and would like to pass on?
I don’t believe there’s anything else you can do but read a lot, write a lot and hope for the best.

What would be your dream writing job?
A dream job? I’m not 12. Who writes these questions?

What’s next for you?
Another novella: Phoney Tony, Plastic Lasagne and The Uncertainty of Friendship.

Have you got a website/event coming up that we can let our members know about?
www.next-to-hemingway.blogspot.com

The Waterstones website

2008-01-31T16:37:00.000Z

There's an article about Queer Fish on the Waterstones website, which, for me, is as exciting as seeing it on their shelves.

Interview with Waterstones

2007-12-24T07:45:00.001Z

This is the publicity shot I've used for my first interview about Queer Fish in God's Waiting Room. A journalist from the Waterstones' website sent me these questions to answer.

What was your favourite childhood book?

If I had one, I can’t remember what it was. I enjoyed writing as a child but I didn’t become an enthusiastic reader until I discovered the Dune books and the novels of Richard Brautigan in my teens.

Which book has made you laugh?

I once cried with laughter on a beach in Cuba reading Don Quixote drunk on mojitos.

Which book has made you cry?

I’ve read books that have upset me – like The Gate by Francois Bizot or Is This a Man by Primo Levi – but I’ve yet to read a book that has made my cry.

Which book would you never have on your bookshelf?

There are plenty of books I’d never buy – novels that don’t match my tastes, say, or political books that don’t reflect my point of view – but there’s no book I’d never read.

Which book are you reading at the moment?

Jesting Pilate by Aldous Huxley.

Which book would you give to a friend as a present?

The Old Man and The Sea by Ernest Hemingway.

Which other writers do you admire?

Charles Dickens for writing his first 5 novels before he was 30, Friedrich Engels for writing The Condition of the Working Class in England, Robert Tressell for writing The Ragged Trousered Philanthropists, and George Orwell for his essays.

Which classic have you always meant to read and never got round to it?

I try and read a classic a year. In 2008 it’ll either be The Satanic Verses or Anna Karenina.

What are your top five books of all time, in order or otherwise?

I wish I had the memory to answer that question properly. Instead, here’s a list of five books I’ve read recently and enjoyed.

Big Sur and The Oranges of Hieronymus Bosch by Henry Miller
The Master and Margarita by Mikhail Bulgakov
One People by Guy Kennaway
Blindness by Jose Saramago
The Thought Gang by Tibor Fischer

Is there a particular book or author that inspired you to be a writer?

When I first met an author socially it was like a bomb hitting its target. It wasn’t what he’d written that inspired me, nor what he had to say about writing, it was simply the thought that if he could do it, why couldn’t I.

What is your favourite time of day to write?

It’s always a good time to write.

And favourite place?

Hot beaches are particularly good for me, but anywhere quiet will do.

Longhand or word processor?

Longhand, every time.

Which fictional character would you most like to have met?

Harry Paget Flashman

Who, in your opinion, is the greatest writer of all time?

Writing isn’t like football or tennis, we don’t have a governing body measuring descriptions of war or turns of phrase.

Which book have you found yourself unable to finish?

I’ve read novels that have bored me from beginning to end, but I’d never think of abandoning one half-way through. I’ll walk out of a film, turn the TV over, or stop an album, but I’ll always finish a book I’ve started.

What is your favourite word?

I like to write with words that everybody uses, so I stalk new phrases instead. Today, for example, I discovered the phrase ‘take owls to Athens’, which has the same meaning as the phrase ‘take coals to Newcastle’.

Other than writing, what other jobs or professions have you undertaken or considered?

Public relations and advertising.

What was the first piece you ever had in print?

A weekly music column in The Macclesfield Express.

What are you working on at the moment?

A novel called The Uncertainty of Friendship.

The cover for Queer Fish in God's Waiting Room

2007-12-09T09:28:00.001Z

The press release for Queer Fish in God's Waiting Room

2007-12-09T09:26:00.000Z

Comedy author gets set to make splash with Queer Fish in God’s Waiting Room

‘Like some stoned new Kerouac, simply brilliant...’Dom Joly.

UK comedian Dom Joly has drawn attention to Legend Press’s new novel, Queer Fish in God’s Waiting Room, calling the surreal comedy ‘simply brilliant’. This endorsement is the latest indication that Queer Fish, by talented new fiction writer Lee Henshaw, is set to make a strong mark in the book world with its fresh style and quirky form of hilarious story-telling. It will be promoted front-of-shop across all Waterstone's, Borders and Books etc branches from the time of its launch in February.

Henshaw originally wrote the book to ask his girlfriend to marry him although the book is far from a standard romance, containing instructions on how to build a blackcurrant bath bong, and featuring a ‘talking fanny’. Luckily the girl in question still said yes and this unusual romantic back-story prompted independent publishers Legend Press to move fast to beat off growing publisher interest. Legend Press is publishing the short novel at the start of February in time for it to be available as the perfect non-mushy and non-traditional Valentine’s Day gift, and all signs point to the novel selling strongly throughout 2008 to become one of the hits of the year.

The quirky comedy has already caught the online world’s attention through a popular blog after the author decided to have 100 copies printed to see how many he could get placed (or ‘shop-gifted’) on bookshop shelves next to his near-namesake Hemingway. He publicised his mission through a blog, which he titled ‘Next to Hemingway’ (www.next-to-hemingway.blogspot.com) and copies were ‘shop-gifted’ all over the UK and around the world. Pictures were taken on each occasion and can be viewed on the blog and also at Henshaw’s ‘Next to Hemingway’ facebook group. Tom Chalmers, Managing Director of Legend Press, commented: “Classically written, yet often unconventional and surreal, this superb book already has a major following as a result of the hugely-popular Next-to-Hemingway blog, and we expect this popularity to grow exponentially when we publish it.

“Set in and around the cities of New York, Mexico and Caracas, Queer Fish in God’s Waiting Room is ‘a cautionary tale for elder brothers and their new girlfriends’. Liam Kerby sets out on a series of three trips with Brother James and his best mate Ed Lover, and on the final journey they are joined by My Claire and Ursula Paradise. This is a story of travelling, fun, and ultimately how – without the use of the right words – new relationships can affect those you thought were unshakable. It’s an often surreal, always brilliant comedy.”

Lee Henshaw lives in London and is married to Claire. He is currently working on a second novel called Phoney Tony, Plastic Lasagne and the Uncertainty of Friendship – a tragicomedy about a young married couple coping with loss. Both this and Queer Fish are represented by Judith Antell of the Antell Agency.

Queer Fish will be out on 2nd February, and will be promoted by Waterstone’s in their 3for2 offer, and also by Borders and Books Etc in their front-of-shop multibuy offers. It is already available to pre-order at www.legendpress.co.uk.

Dom Joly says...

2007-11-26T19:52:00.000Z

I asked the British comedian Dom Joly if he'd be kind enough to give me a quote for the cover of Queer Fish in God's Waiting Room. I gave Dom a draft of it some months ago and he was very encouraging. He described it to me as being very "Holden Caulfieldesque" (Holden Caulfield is the protagonist of J.D. Salinger's 1951 novel The Catcher in the Rye).

This is what Dom has to say for the cover: "Like some stoned new Kerouac, simply brilliant...."

Mike Power has put Queer Fish in God's Waiting Room next to Hemingway

2007-11-26T10:01:00.001Z

Mike Power, in a wholly unconvincing Che Guevara disguise involving nothing more than his sunglasses and a too-small beret borrowed off a strange woman, puts Queer Fish In God's Waiting Room next to Hemingway in Barnes and Noble, Astor Place, East Village, New York City, on November 21, 2007

Who judges books by their covers?

2007-11-17T16:30:00.000Z

So, my novel will be published in February, and it needs a cover. It's likely to be one of these three.

My publisher, Tom, says that covers are very important. That they sell books. That people really do judge a book by its cover.

I can't recall a book's cover ever influencing my decision to purchase it, nor an album's cover now I come to think of it. I'm not contesting that such things go on, I just can't see it.

I do like a good cover. I'm looking at one for John Kennedy Toole's A Confederacy of Dunces. I much prefer this grotesque Ignatious J Reilly, the book's protaganist, compared to the comic version that's on most editions. But I didn't know who Ignatious J Reilly was when I bought the book, and I bought it because my friend had told me it was his favourite book, so any cover would have done.

I would welcome your comments on which cover you think is best - the first, second or third - and what you think it says, if anything, about the book.

Damon Oldcorn has put Queer Fish in God's Waiting room...into the hands of the proprietor of The White Horse bookshop.

2007-10-22T11:55:00.000+01:00

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Name: Damon Oldcorn/The proprietor of the White Horse Bookshop

Location: The White Horse Bookshop, Marlborough High Street, Wiltshire

Date: sometime in October 2007

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Mick and Martha Clarke have put Queer Fish in God's Waiting Room next to Hemingway

2007-10-19T15:30:00.001+01:00

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Name: Mick and Martha Clarke

Location: Waterstone's, Notting Hill Gate

Date: 18th October 2007
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Jules Lewis has put Queer Fish in God's Waiting Room next to...the bestsellers in Morrisons

2007-10-01T12:17:00.000+01:00

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Name: Jules Lewis

Location: Morrisons supermarket, Northampton

Date: Saturday 29th September

Time: mid-afternoon
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Robert Grundy has put Queer Fish in God's Waiting Room next to Hemingway

2007-09-26T15:17:00.000+01:00

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Name: Robert Grundy

Location: Waterstone's, Camden Town

Date: 26th September 2007

Time: early afternoon
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Jenny MacLeod has put Queer Fish in God's Waiting Room next to Hemingway

2007-09-25T12:35:00.000+01:00

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Name: Jenny MacLeod

Location: The Book and Card Centre, Brodick, Isle of Arran

Date: Monday 24th September

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Davina Simpson has put Queer Fish in God's Waiting Room next to Hemingway

2007-09-24T14:32:00.000+01:00

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Name: Davina Simpson

Location: Magma, Manchester

Date: Sunday 23rd September

Time: Morning
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Tina Vigon has put Queer Fish in God's Waiting Room next to Hemingway

2007-09-24T13:06:00.003+01:00

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Name: Tina Vigon

Location: WHSmiths, Chiswick

Date: Sunday 23rd September

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James Henshaw has put Queer Fish in God's Waiting Room next to Hemingway

2007-09-24T12:54:00.000+01:00

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Name: James Henshaw

Location: Waterstone's, Soho

Date: Saturday 22nd September

Time: Afternoon
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Nina Kennerley has put Queer Fish in God's Waiting Room next to Hemingway

2007-09-24T12:33:00.000+01:00

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Name: Nina Kennerley

Location: Borders, Soho

Date: Saturday 22nd September

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Viv Pheysey has put Queer Fish in God's Waiting Room next to Hemingway

2007-09-21T11:25:00.001+01:00

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Name: Viv Pheysey

Location: FNAC, Valencia, Spain

Date: Last weekend

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Dan Howarth has put Queer Fish in God's Waiting Room next to Hemingway

2007-09-21T09:24:00.000+01:00

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Name: Dan Howarth

Location: Borders, Soho

Date: 20th September 2007

Time: Morning
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Simon O'Donovan has put Queer Fish in God's Waiting Room next to Hemingway

2007-09-19T17:50:00.001+01:00

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Name: Simon O'Donovan

Location: John Sandoe Books Ltd, London

Date: 18th September

Time: daytime

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Brian Duffy has put Queer Fish in God's Waiting Room next to Hemingway

2007-09-17T14:35:00.000+01:00

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Name: Brian Duffy

Location: Ocean Bookshop, Stoke Newington

Date: 16th September 2007

Time: afternoon
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David Ward has put Queer Fish in God's Waiting Room next to Hemingway

2007-09-17T14:25:00.000+01:00

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Name: David Ward

Location: Church Street Bookshop, Stoke Newington

Date: 16th September 2007

Time: afternoon
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Steve Smith has put Queer Fish in God's Waiting Room next to Hemingway

2007-09-17T14:12:00.000+01:00

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Name: Steve Smith

Location: Ocean Bookshop,
Stoke Newington

Date: 16th September 2007

Time: afternoon
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Bianca Hall has put Queer Fish in God's Waiting Room next to Hemingway

2007-09-12T13:08:00.001+01:00

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Name: Bianca Hall

Location: Bibliophane, Paris

Date: Last Monday (3rd September)

Time: Morning

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No photo inside sadly, she got chased out.

Claire and Marni Henshaw have put Queer Fish in God's Waiting Room next to Hemingway

2007-09-12T11:02:00.001+01:00

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Name: Claire and Marni
Henshaw

Location: The Strand Bookshop,
Padstow, Cornwall

Date: Last week

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Mark Elkins has put Queer Fish in God's Waiting Room next to Hemingway

2007-09-11T17:59:00.000+01:00

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Name: Mark Elkins

Location: Borders, Islington

Date: 10th September 2007

Time: Lunchtime

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James, Livvy and Owen Lavino have put Queer Fish in God's Waiting Room next to Hemingway

2007-09-10T16:08:00.000+01:00

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Name: James, Livvy and Owen Lavino

Location: Waterstone's, Islington

Date: 9th September

Time: afternoon

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Edward and Natalia Parker have put Queer Fish in God's Waiting Room next to Hemingway

2007-09-10T16:01:00.000+01:00

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Name: Edward and Natalia Parker

Location: A bookshop in Cambridge

Date: 8th September

Time: 15.40

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Adrian and Milly Lee have put Queer Fish in God's Waiting Room next to Hemingway

2007-09-10T15:33:00.000+01:00

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Name: Adrian Lee
and his daughter Milly

Location: Waterstone's,
Notting Hill

Date: 8th September

Time: 11am

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Next to Hemingway explained

2007-09-10T11:44:00.001+01:00

Like any author I want to find an audience for my work.

There are lots of ways to do this and the most obvious, of course, is to find a publisher.

I did have a publisher for my previous book, an Oasis biography, but that was written over ten years ago and, if my memory serves me correctly, they fucked me on the deal.

I don't know anybody in the publishing industry, and I don't have the stomach for cold calls.

So instead I've asked my friends to help me find an audience for the book by putting it in bookshops.

It's a curious approach, I'll give you that, but it shows confidence, I think, which is always a better look than desperation.

If you have stumbled across this blog and you'd like a copy of Queer Fish in God's Waiting Room to put next to Hemingway, then please email me. I'll keep sending them out until the 100 I have are gone.

Julian Davies has put Queer Fish in God's Waiting Room next to Hemingway

2007-09-04T17:48:00.000+01:00

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Name: Julian Davies

Location: Waterstone's, Ludgate Hill, London

Date: 4th September

Time: Lunchtime

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100 copies printed

2007-08-31T17:04:00.000+01:00

With the help of designer Dave Simpson I've printed 100 copies of the book.